The Cooooold Changes

What if the person you ever wanted in your life suddenly changes?

That tormenting pain in your chest is uncontrollable. Like a virus that spreads - it poisons your troubled mind, infects your weary heart and successfully numb your lifeless body.

Oooh okay that was too exaggerating for someone experiencing coldness and pain. Yet it's genuine. Forgive me anyway. Here's a bit more realistic though...

It's like...

You'll just hope that the person will talk to you again..just like before. That old sweet endless conversations. When you both freely share your thoughts, you laugh at each other's silly jokes, you even argue a lot but always end up okay. You both never lose time for each other - even how busy you are or how busy that person may be. You almost thought you are both strong enough to keep things going that way. That there will be no dull moments or even room for boredom. Talking to that person obviously had become your most favorited daily habit, and you guess it was also been added to that person's everyday routine. Everything was just as perfect you never thought it would be. The sweet connection you shared  The precious attraction you had. Everything about you and that person is beyond perfection.

Just all of a sudden, changes start to occur. You are left alone wondering what had gone wrong. You got no clue (or maybe you did) The person haven't told you anything or even if that person did, it wasn't clear enough to understand and hold on to it that it will all be okay after that or anytime soon. Ohh the person once admitted something then instantly dismiss it with that word "Forget it." How worse could it get? The person turned cold, you can feel that distant feeling. From all of the excuses, you just knew it. Acting like perfectly okay but deep down inside it's tearing you up everytime you just know that the person purposely ignores you. All you can do is cry and cry and cry until tears run out falling from your most puffified eyes. And after that, you've been overthinking until it feels like killing you inside already. Like an invisible hand that's continuously stabbing you inside and out until you feel no pain anymore. You're dead. You wished. But oh no, just emotionally dead. Time to dig up and bury that feelings deep down under. As you cry and cry again because you still can't do it. It's all work of your mind that your heart strongly disagreed. You aren't brave enough to do. You hoped you could be like the person who does it to you. Strong and motivated to be cold to you.  In reality. you don't actually die. You just have to deal with life's constant change.

Why? What happened? Seriously, how can you be cold to someone you want to be with for the rest of your days? All you ever wanted to offer them is your warmest heart and hot-burning love. Maybe they might want it. but sooner or later, they'll want something else's more.

Ever wished re-heating them up in a microwave or stove top when they all get cold? Hope so.


In the end, It will always be just you, yourself and the universe laughing hard coz you failed again..

I swear.